5 Tips for Sneaking a Beer at the Royal Wedding
It’s been widely reported that Prince William and Kate Middleton have banned beer at the reception for their much over-hyped wedding Friday. According to an unnamed source in a Daily Mirror story, “Let’s face it, it isn’t really an appropriate drink to be serving in the Queen’s presence at such an occasion. And while the younger royals enjoy a pint from time to time, neither Kate nor William is a big beer drinker so they decided to leave it off the menu.”
We here at Road Trips for Beer call “Bollocks!” Though wine and champagne will be part of the menu, the worst wedding receptions we’ve ever attended were also beer-free zones, not to mention that beer is a big part of British culture. Therefore, we feel obligated to offer these five techniques for having a pint or two while you’re toasting the royal couple, despite this bugger of a prohibition.
1. Locate the pubs nearest to Buckingham Palace. You can pop out for a pint or two during the least interesting parts of the reception (pretty much the entire thing).
2. Follow Prince Harry around. William’s younger brother and his crew are notorious beer tipplers. He’s sure to have a secret stash tucked away somewhere in the palace. Chat him up about rugby or cricket or one of those other crazy British sports.
3. Bribe the staff. Sneak around back to the kitchen door (I believe it’s near the south croquet court. Don’t trip over the wickets). Hand a bottle of Sam Adams Utopia, Chimay Grande Reserve, or other fine brew in a champagne-like container, and few pounds, to one of the servers and ask that it be poured exclusively in your flute.
4. Tailgate! Skip the wedding and arrive at the reception early, with a cooler of beer stashed in your boot (That’s a “car trunk” to us in the colonies). Catch a pre-party buzz while listening to the wedding play-by-play over the radio.
5. Screw it all. If you’re like us, your invitation was lost in the mail anyway (and we had picked a lovely Dustbuster as a gift). Either belly up to a bar where the wedding’s being televised, or ignore it all together and proceed with your normal beer-drinking maneuvers.
Do you have any other suggestions?
Editors note: This is the one and only time the royal wedding will be mentioned on Road Trips for Beer.